US Patrol Secret Wall Outlet Stash Box

us patrol hidden wall safe

Score: Half-Baked

You thought this review was about the US Patrol Secret Wall Outlet Stash Box, right?  Um, why do you want to know?  What, are you paranoid? Have something to hide??  If you’re hoping this product will put your paranoia at ease, think again.  Order it anyway and wait for your stress hormones to skyrocket as the US Patrol Secret Wall Outlet Stash Box literally falls apart in your hands.

If you are reading this, I know what you’re thinking:

I can put my weed in there!

And, yeah, that might be true.  But if you live in the States shown here, 

You won’t have to worry about it because in these States, weed is legal.  However, if you are one of the unfortunate millions of souls living in Arizona, Florida, Louisiana, Oklahoma, or Texas, you need to find some place to stash your s**t!

What is the best feature of the US Patrol Secret Wall Outlet Stash Box?

Pros

  • Are you a sheet rock enthusiast?  If not, you will be thankful that US Patrol includes a handy dandy installation template along with some tools to get you on the right track with sawing a hole in your wall and installing this thing.
  • I personally love the idea of this.  It’s sneaky, it’s sexy, it’s spy vs. spy and all that, but ONLY if the po po doesn’t bring their K9-unit.  The US Patrol Secret Wall Outlet Stash Box does not come with coffee grounds or a vacuum sealer, so you will be hard-pressed to stink proof this thing and according to most accounts, there’s not a whole lot of room in there, so whatever you do, be prepared for a compact solution.
  • Some people (mostly suckers, jk) have said that this wall outlet stash box looks real.
  • Lets face it.  It’s a crap item, but I still want 3.  THAT’S how GOOD it is.
  • I know this is still the pro section, but this is pro stupid ok.  The outlet is not the same size as a normal outlet!  It might not be a dead giveaway… I don’t know many people who are geeked out on outlets, but it is a huge oversight.  For a size comparison, I’ve included two images here to give you a clearer picture:
Muhammad Ali 6'3"
Muhammad Ali – 6’4″
tom cat, tom cruise 5'7"
Tom Cruise (Tom Cat)- 5’7″

Cons

  • Cheap.  27 negative Amazon reviews don’t lie.  Customers have mostly complained about the poor quality of the stash box, and I know they really, really wanted to love this.
  • The screw is cheap, the key is cheap (and a silly gimmick).  Reports of the screw head immediately stripping, the item missing parts on arrival and someone even said it disintegrated in their hands.  Beam me up, scotty.
  • Other choice comments from Amazon include, “Bad X-mas present”, “worst thing I bought from Amazon”, “real cheap”, and “garbage.”
  • My recommendation:  If you want a more reliable and durable, not to mention spacious secret stash solution, check out the

Evelots Home Dictionary Diversion Locking Book Safe

Still interested in this product?

Here’s How US Patrol Wants You to Hear It:



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